ROLEY

Tag: Cats

  • Monday, November 14th, 2022

    • As we begin another week, I want to note what happened last week. While the craziness was going on, my wife was in the hospital, and it wasn’t a good thing for the first couple of days. Thankfully she turned a corner, and we returned home on Sat. So, she is fine, and WE are fine.

    But, on the other hand, I am not OK, and I’m not anywhere near fine. I haven’t been fine for a long time, and I’m surprised that I even have the self-awareness to recognize it. What I can’t do, haven’t been able to do, is define the problem. I can tell you that not a lot matters to me right now. I’ve just become indifferent to just about everything. My default response lately is a shrug and some Meh. I don’t want to be around people, haven’t wanted to be around people for a while. I’m getting sick of social media, I’ve almost deleted all my accounts 3 or 4 times in as many months. I basically feel like disappearing, I feel like no one would care much if I did, and I might just be ok with that. To be clear, I’m not having thoughts of self-harm. Not talking about unaliving. I’m talking about checking out from the world and being alone.

    I’m exhausted. I’ve had so much on my plate for so long it’s finally gotten to me. One of my ex-girlfriends from the Mesozoic Era that still keeps in contact with me every now and then tells me that I’m on the verge of a breakthrough. Doesn’t seem that way. A breakDOWN on the other hand, I’ll buy that. Of course, I probably can’t be having a breakdown if I’m thinking I’m having a breakdown. I don’t think that’s how it works. I’ve said on occasion that I think I need to see a therapist, the trick is finding the time to see a therapist. That’s funny. I know this, every tool I’ve learned to use since my moment of clarity in Sept 2005 isn’t working. I think I need help.

    • I heard someone ask another person if knowledge and belief had a divorce inside them, and that has got to be the politest of burns. I must remember that one.

    • Congress is back in session today to begin their ‘lame-duck’ session. I encourage you to watch the proceedings on C-SPAN and stop letting other people tell you about it. See it for yourself. As we get closer to the end of the Continuing Resolution to fund the Government on December 16th, start taking note of the things the parties say. They’re going to complain about being held up in DC when they could be home for the Holidays, just like they’ve said for every fucking year they kick the can down the road and put themselves in this position. This is the beginning of an education on how the playbook only changes colors every few years, but everything else is the same. Watch what happens in the House if the GOP take the House. The Dems will start using all the complaints and parliamentary tricks the GOP used. They also won’t actually solve anything definitively. Ever. This should make you mad.

    • On a related note, the pleas for bipartisanship will last about a week until the President says or does something they can interpret as not really meaning it. Just like they do at the beginning of every Congress as long as I can remember. Really. This bullshit rarely changes, and that should outrage you. I promise you, if people actually watched Congress do it’s job, they would demand better Reps and Senators. Also, younger. Grassley is 89 years old. He voted with a feather and a fucking inkwell when he started. I’m begging y’all. Start paying attention to first degree sources, and stop giving the outrage machine, the angertainment, the infotainment…the NOOZ your time.

    I’ll leave you with a photo Kimmers took of a minor victory. Oreo is very clearly Kim’s cat, but she’s starting to trust me. I think some guy abused her and abandoned her, and that’s why she lives here now. This was a pleasant surprise.

  • ZPM Diary, October 23rd, 2022

    The business has picked up here, as Good Ol’ JR might say, though not in the best ways. Topping the list is our cat Mariel, who gave us quite a scare. To be fair, she’s a senior cat now, so slowing down a bit is to be expected. We got very concerned when she stopped eating, became lethargic, and had no interest in anything. One trip to the vet later, they believe we’re dealing with kidney disease or failure. She’s on a special diet and on a med that gooses her appetite, and we’ll see at the check-up in a week or so. I can tell you that in the week we’ve been on the medication and the special food, she’s been eating. She’s also the cat we know and love again. I know that not eating can present kidney problems in cats if not treated, but I no longer believe the kidney disease was the source of the issue, but possibly an outgrowth from it. We have a new cat in the house, and I think Mariel was depressed and not eating, and that was the start of the whole shebang. Luckily, she’s eating again. She lost a lot of weight in this episode, so I’m hopeful we can get her back to an average, healthy weight.

    I must confess I never understood why people would spend money hand over fist for a pet, especially if the quality of life of that pet wouldn’t get better. I think I have a frame of reference now. I’m not throwing in the towel on Mariel until I know there’s nothing to do but give her some peace. That cat adopted us, not the other way ’round. I’ll do whatever I can for her.

    As it’s Sunday and I have a 24-hour lag on anything Doctor Who-related around here, I’ve been trying to avoid spoilers like the plague. Having said this, there’s one particular pathetic excuse for a human that has never liked Jodie Whitaker in the role because she’s a woman that’s been gloating all day. This waste of space is everything wrong with fandom: The belief that this story and this character were made just for you, or people like you. It’s not. Gatekeep deez nuts.

    I hope you choke on your bile the day Ncuti shows up. It’s almost like RTD saw you and said “Hold my beer, you bearded taint.”

    Podcast/Content update for ya. Looking at starting things back up after the beginning of November. The Main Show will be once a week, and there will be two shows a week for Patreon. That’s how we’re going to start. I’m looking at some other content to put up, but that’s going to be down the road a piece. I need to establish the Main and Bonus shows. Stay Tuned for other stuff.

    I need some idea of what to do next for a video or a photo shoot. I’m tapped for ideas at the moment. Seeking inspiration, I guess. Part of being in a low key depression for a long time is a dry and somewhat foggy brain. The gym helps, d’ya think it’s time to go back? Not gonna lie, the macaroni still has me somewhat stressed.

    That’s all for now, see ya next week with more.

  • ZPM Diary, October 2nd 2022

    This is Oreo. I am not sure of Oreo’s origin, but I know that she absolutely adores the wife. Up until a few days ago, she lived in the space between my fence and the neighbors. I do believe that she belongs (or belonged) to someone, because she successfully used a litter box. I don’t think feral cats do that as a general rule, so Oreo’s been potty trained. With Hurricane Ian bringing tropical force winds and cubic assload of rain to Virginia Beach, Kimmers asked if she could bring Oreo indoors. By asking, I mean that it was made clear that Oreo is coming in the house AND YOU DON’T MIND, DO YOU.

    DO. YOU.

    Of course not. I was worried about the existing Queen of the house being territorial, but we’re now on day three and they seem to tolerate each other. They’re sleeping on the same bed as I type this. So, it would appear that Kim has been chosen by another cat. A very affectionate, very talkative cat. Reminds me of my Siamese cat Darth in that regard. You could carry full conversations with Darth, Oreo is not far off.

    My guilty pleasure these days are HGTV or MotorTrend restoration shows. I find them a little different from the normal “Reality TV” fare, because there’s a tangible result at the end. They’re accomplishing something. Shows like Chrisley, to pick one out of the air, are manufactured drama, conflict, and resolution. In a word, bullshit. However, left to my own devices, I’ll just zone out and watch back to back restoration shows. It’s not exactly healthy, but let’s face a little fact: I’ve worked at the day job for a year straight with no time off until last week, and one week off wasn’t near enough to cure what ails me. The burnout is real. So, maybe self care is a endless train of Flip or Flop and Wheeler Dealers.

    Don’t hate.

    We’re now in the middle of the changing of the weather guard here. Kim likes fall, she just likes the changing of seasons. I spent the years between 5 and 12 in Hawaii, Virginia Beach and Gitmo. Yeah, I’m FROM Maine, but there’s a reason I say I’m FROM Maine. I DO NOT LIVE THERE NOW. I hate being cold for a number of reasons, but mainly because I’ve really never spent more than a couple of weeks at a time in Maine, mainly during Summer vacations, the exception being the Winter of 1982-1983. That was more than enough for me to vow I’d never go back there in the Winter. Hell, even October is too much. When we took my grandmother home after she passed, October 30, 2003. That morning it was 20 degrees. I’d rather not, thank you very hard.

    This week I ported all the posts from the old Squarespace site over here to the new WordPress site. There’s more photos I’ll add that never appeared anywhere, and the poddlement will be returning shortly. ALSO: I finally figure out what the hell to do with the Patreon. I’ve paused it for the time being, and when I bring it back, there will be only one five dollar tier. You’ll get audio that I make just for the Patrons that will be a daily nugget with what I think is important that day, my stupid ass take on it, and when it fits, and stories about why you should absolutely use me as a bad example. The trouble has always been that my ambition is way larger than my ability to match that level of ambition. What I need to do is produce what I can realistically give you consistently. So, I’m gonna give that a try. I anticipate that we’ll start November 1st, but we’ll see. It’s possible I’ll wait until January 1st so that I’m not starting and then breaking for Thanksgiving and Chhristmas. Let’s leave the frequent absences from work to Congress.

    I need to check on the feline armistice, so that’s all for now.